How our relationship with our mothers changes after we have a baby {Mother's Day Special}

There are innumerable instances during our growing-up times when we have got irritated by our mothers in some way or the other. In more times than one, our petulance has been because of her fussing about things we felt we could handle with a breeze. Things remain more or less the same till there is a change in status-when we become mum & our mother becomes grand-mum. It starts that very moment when we hold our baby for the first time & feel that inexplicable new bond with him. That is when we realize what exactly our mother felt when she held us for the first time. That is when we start looking at every little “mistake” of her’s in a different light.

Their over-protective “idiocies” seem to be justified when we get paranoid about our kids going to a new place or when they are with a new babysitter. The teenage years made a lot of us hate our mothers for constantly keeping a tab on who we met & where we went but that is something we ourselves end up doing.  Mothers of elder kids who go out are given strict instructions to inform mom once they safely reach their destination. Back during our time we felt the same behavior by our mother was way too ridiculous & over-done.

Looking at things from a parent’s perspective we know mom was right in doing what she did. We all have a complex relationship with our mothers and all these complexities seem to magically unravel as soon as we step into their shoes via motherhood. We forgive her for all the perceived indifferences. We start being grateful for her being what she was. Well this entire process of being admirable of one’s mother doesn’t happen overnight. You don't out of the blue wake up after becoming a mum and realize you've turned into your own mother. It's more piecemeal than that.

It's unquestionably true that we can never really value our mothers until we are mom ourselves. And once we understand what being a mother really is all about, for most of us our relationship with our own mother strengthens and gets better.

And a little advice while we are discussing this topic, if you have eventually realized your mother’s true value after being a mother, don’t waste any more time & make it known to her how special she is. You would love if your child did it, won’t you? So why not make her happy?